Women's Infidelity

Well, I feel as if I have stepped into something here. Or, at the very least I have walked in on someone else's uncomfortable discussion. I will avoid all the noise surrounding this and get to the point.

Apparently a book called Women's Infidelity has caused somewhat of a stir. (The website is here: http://womensinfidelity.com/) I have spent very little time with it, and, frankly, don't intend to. It is a little too detailed - and a little too late! - for what I need. So I will not get distracted on it.

However, there was one paragraph that seemed to express my spouse's circumstances exactly! Here it is in the discussion of "Stage 4":

The women in stage four included those who chose to stay married and continue their affairs and those who chose to divorce. Some of the women who continued their affairs stated that marital sex was improved by maintaining the extramarital relationship. Some thought the lover was a soul mate, but for one reason or another did not leave their husband and did not feel torn between the two. Others realized that their feelings were intensified by not sharing day-to-day living arrangements with their lover. Almost all of the women in this latter category were having affairs with married men. They believed their affairs could continue indefinitely without disrupting either partner’s primary relationship.

I have highlighted the particular relevant items with bold font. The are "did not feel torn between the two" and "without disrupting either partner's primary relationship." This is exactly and precisely what my wife felt! She continues to maintain that her feelings for each of us were independent and had nothing to do with each other.

I don't know what to make of it - I have some deadlines coming up and other things I need to work on. But I wanted to put this out there. I will reflect on it more later.